My Epilogue

My Demon came to me when I was 15. With wings like Gemini, he comforted me through all the lonely nights

My Angel came when i was 16, she can be real fucked, fanged teeths, the only time she’s cool is when I drank

I call them my Nightmares

My escape is the House in the Snow. When times everything feel like a burden I hide there, where none except my Nightmares can reach

My Dreams are dead


Enchanted Castle


Why did you do this to me?

Have you heard of the story about the enchanted castle? The one that made our ember called love a burning bright flame and our feeligs come to life.

I’ve never been this sure, even just in a week of knowing you. Now you want to leave me?

I’ve walked miles and miles just to see you, wether you’re fine or not, knowing your problems to show my love to you.

I walked through numerous buildings, took numerous public transports but instead of these efforts, ruins are all that’s left

This castle is in ruin and I’m devastated, sad fucking sad.

Just hoping that the magic will return back! Because I have nothing left and the castle is my home.

I’ll lose you, the one I called my home, my castle.

Love, Rosie

My suicide note

Five years, the same spot under the same tree, counting to midnight alone, again.

Five years, the same song on repeat, the same moon, the same stars, but never the same me, again

Five years, have I killed myself to the moon, stars, and smile that I adore, again

Five years, nothing but a living corpse shedding my vows through my tears, again

“Sometimes I doubt the path I chose, and my dreams feel all on hold. There’s no doubt that this will make me strong because its the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

Despite this cruel world and all my best efforts, you surprise with just how perfect you are. Even with all my flaws and my bad examples, you surprise me with just how perfect you are

And when I’m lost, you search for me. And when I doubt, you’re my belief. I am supposed to be the stronger one but you always seem to prove my theory wrong

When Im all in a spin, full of cynicism you surprise me with just how perfect you are When I’m at my wits end and I’m losing my head, you remind me of just how lucky I am

Still I hold my breath each time you go but in a world that’s beyond my control, if you are dreaming I’d never want to wake you up”

Five years have past and I still wish for death as my gift, again.


Letters that can never be sent because of another love

On the hood of scarlet car, his bright eyes shine under the blue moon, and in his hand a peice of parchment and a quill that’s trying to word out his guilt. As the night clouds began to ingulf the moon,  he jot down the thoughts of  his heart. 

 Kesayangan, ​I wanna take you somewhere so you know I care but it’s so cold and I don’t know where. I brought you daffodils in a pretty string but they won’t flower like they did last spring. 

And I wanna kiss you, make you feel alright. I’m just so tired to share my nights

I wanna cry and I wanna love but all my tears have been used up on another love, another love

It started to fall, not the rain, his tears. He wished for her warm embrace, but every time he closes his eyes. He sees another love. Setting them apart, and him in peices. Mustering his spirits he wrote. 

And if somebody hurts you, I wanna fight but my hands been broken, once too many times. So I’ll use my voice, I’ll be so fucking rude. Words they always win, but I know I’ll lose

And I’d sing a song, that’d be just ours but I sang ’em all to another heart. And I wanna cry I wanna learn to love but all my tears have been used up. 

On another love

As his tears dried. He long to cry more. The capacity to feel more. To show more. To feel more. It started to rain, as if the sky was sympathetic towards him and his lack of heart. As he crumbles the parchment he whispered to his heart. 

“All my love have been used up”

This is twice now 

The heavy snow of the depressing night rage on. overtaking everything in my way. I just hope that I could make it on time. I walked through the front door and searched for any sign of him. I found him weeping in the cold shower

“Baby just ask once more, because I saw your door wide open. The floor is still freezing. Would you come with me and fix this together? ”

” I was sick and still quite unwell. Tell me its you or nothing at all. I stole your soul because you said I’d never be able. But the whole world is on my string. Im just a burden to you. Leave me alone “

He pushed  me away. Oh how I wished for me to fix him, and how could’ve been happy together. But he knew, none can fix him anymore. He’s too far gone. I’ve decided to keep him company for that night. 

The next morning, I woke up with sound of the car sprinting away. And a letter was next of me. 

“Its second time now and you’ve done this before, drive around the back so I cant see that youre freezing but youre still freezing arent you? ” I murmured alone 

Last letter

Let me take your coat your keys and this car because I’ve been unwell for far too long now. Ive stole your soul and you felt the obligation to change me. Dont. Ill be alright from now on. Dont try to find me. But all the whole world is still on my string,  and now my string wont tie you down anymore. 

To my kesayangan,


I hope so too, but you stole my soul. And this body longs for its soul. You may think that youre burdening me, but the absent of you is my agony.